One day I needed to go to the shops but I didn’t know which way to go. I started running every where to try to find the shops. “Which way to the shops?” I panted, “I need to do my shopping because I am hungry my cupboard is empty I’m gonna die!” I Decided to go home so I can get my car and use the map to go to the shop then I set up the map to the shop then I see the shop.
Hi Harry,
Thank you for your post. Overall, the setting of the story makes sense. The main contents including the character, reason of being out of breath, and what to buy from the shop are all clearly stated. But it might be good to maybe add more details or twists and turns to enrich your story. Anyway, well done!
Xuerong Huang (Team 100wc)